This time of year is a great opportunity to really take inventory as a parent and assess whether or not you are satisfied with how you are parenting.
Are you living out the values and principles you preach to your children? Are you holding yourself to the same standards your children are held too? These are great questions between couples to really make an honest assessment as to where the family has been and where you would like it to go.
New Years can be a moment when you do a little correction to make sure your family is on course to reach your intended destination. Without these minor changes to your coordinates and especially to your family this large ocean called life, filled with its wind and storms, will take over your family and lead them places you never intended.
Here are three possible New Years Resolutions that could provide a subtle course change for parents wanting to get their family facing the right direction:
1. Connect, connect, connect – keep in mind that a connected kid is a cooperative kid. Be intentional about spending one on one time with each child on a weekly basis. At least schedule 20-30 minutes with them and actually allow them to decide what to play.
Let this time be kid directed. Kids love, love, love playing with their parents. When an adult gets on a kids level and is willing to relate to them, even if it is just a few minutes, it really opens up a doorway to their heart. Play some Legos, build with blocks, wrestle with them, but make this time about truly and deeply connecting with them.
2. Choose composure – make 2015 the year of no more yelling and screaming at the kids. No parent wants to be the parent all the kids run from because of how quick they are to lose their temper. Kids really enjoy spending time with parents that are calm and reasonable.
A cool byproduct is that this approach raises calm and reasonable kids. This is a resolution that your kids and spouse can help with as well. When I made this commitment to my kids they were more than willing to remind me when I was not following through. At that time it was hard to hear but it always reminded me that this wasn’t going to solve the problem and I needed to find a better solution.
3. Be an encourager – it is very simple as a parent to notice when your children are messing up or not doing what you have asked. It is even easier to point it out to them and really rub it in their faces as well.
In 2015, make a commitment to notice when they are being kind, helpful, friendly, polite, etc. Most of this stuff goes unnoticed by parents and rarely talked about with their children. Start watching in expectation for these moments because every kid has them and they need to be told about it.
Maybe each night when they are going to bed let them know about something they did that day that was impressive, no matter how small, it would mean the world to them. Try this with your spouse as well and I bet you will have a happier marriage.
These are three simple resolutions that can completely transform the direction your family is heading as they begin their journey through 2015. I hope you will try one if not all three and see how much of an impact it can make.
Happy New Year!!!!
